


Accidentally on Purpose

by torino10154



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Accidental Bondage, Anal Sex, Bondage, Ficlet, First Time, Humor, M/M, Magical Accidents, Object Insertion, Size Kink, Slash, Vegetables
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-26
Updated: 2015-02-26
Packaged: 2018-03-15 09:18:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3441758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/torino10154/pseuds/torino10154





	Accidentally on Purpose

**Author's Note:**

  * For [gryffindorJ](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gryffindorJ/gifts).



"Bloody hell, Teddy."

Teddy winced. He'd hoped to get out of this, er, delicate situation before James got home. 

All he'd wanted was to prepare himself. He'd be stretched and slick, and James would trip in the door and fall on top of him. Armed with only his glorious cock, he'd spear Teddy straight through and they'd fuck happily ever after.

That's how he'd imagined it anyway.

"How was work?" Teddy said lightly. 

"Work," James said as if he was speaking a foreign language. 

Teddy flinched in surprise when James reached out and touched his side but then relaxed as his fingers gentled into a caress.

"I didn't expect you home yet..." 

"Are you going to tell me why you're trussed up like a Christmas goose on the kitchen table with an enormous parsnip sticking out of your arse?"

Teddy'd gone to a lot of trouble for one that still had the greenery on the top, thank you very much. 

"No?"

James walked around in front of Teddy and he had no choice but to look at him—though he did notice the sizable erection tenting his trousers. 

He licked his lips.

James's eyes widened and then a small smile curled the corners of his mouth. "You could have just said, 'Oi, Potter, fancy a shag?'"

Teddy grinned and said, "Oi, Potter, fancy a shag?"

"Christ, yes," James said, reaching for his flies. 

Teddy groaned when James freed his cock from his pants. Long and thick with a deep red head, it was the stuff of every gay man's wet dreams. 

"Are you going to untie me?" Teddy asked when James stepped out of view.

"Not a chance." 

Teddy moaned low in his throat as James gingerly removed the parsnip and clambered up onto the table behind him.

"I never thought," James said, panting as he lined up his cock and pushed inside, "that our first time would be like this."

"God, Jamie, just fuck me," Teddy said, relishing the feeling of hot, firm flesh deep in his arse. No toy—and certainly no root vegetable—was an adequate substitute for the real thing.


End file.
